Wedding Favors

Marriage reconciliation – the first approach.

More often than not, the approach to a counselor for assistance to help repair a relationship is made by only one of the partners. It is a established fact that in most cases this is the woman rather than the man.
 
In the early stages of consultation with a guidance counselor it is normal practice for them to deal exclusively with the party who made the initial approach. This is considered the most effective way of handling the situation as that particular party has already demonstrated a [desire wish] to reconcile. An experienced counselor will have dealt with most marriage issues and will formulate a plan to help guide you through the reconciliation process. You may however feel that you are capable of dealing with your break up in your own way without any additional help.

Be absolutely honest with yourself.

The first step to reconciling your marital relationship is to consider just what went wrong in your marriage and then decide whether or not it’s possible to repair the relationship. You must be painstakingly honest with yourself about the reason(s) for the marital difficulties which led to the   reason for your marriage breaking up. If you just evade the issue and are not prepared to air, or admit to yourself, the reasons for your troubled relationship, (and the part that you may have played in it) then if you do manage to reconcile, the chances are that you will just head down the same path as previously with no hope for a permanent reconciliation.  

There may possibly be some negative aspects concerning your demeanor, dress, attitude, stubbornness and so on that you can work on correcting. If you are able to identify with any of these or any other negative traits then it would be in your best interests to work on changing them for the betterment of your relationship.

Approaching your ex spouse.

This can be quite difficult. However there are ways of approaching this:

• The casual approach at a place that you are aware that your ex frequents.
• Take the initiative and write, text or email, asking for a chat to just catch up over a coffee etc.
• Have a friend act as an intermediary to set up a meeting to discuss matters of mutual interest.

It is advantageous at the initial meeting with your ex to simply keep the conversation super cool. Cover superficial subjects only, unless you are drawn into a deeper conversation by your ex–then go with the flow. He/she may be just as interested as you are to save your marriage. If the subject of your reconciliation doesn’t arise then just lay the ground work for a further meeting at which you can subtly raise the subject of a second try into the conversation.

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